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When I stand up, I'll be strong again.

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Sitting in my closet, I wasn't close enough to the wall to lean against it. I put my hand down to adjust my position. It's wet. I had soaked the carpet with my tears. Not 10 minutes ago, my husband found me lying on the closet floor in the fetal position, sobbing into my hands. We had just done family pictures today so my "full face of makeup" was smeared all over my cheeks with my falsies popping up on the corners.  "Honey, are you okay?" he asked.  "I miss Everly."  "Did something happen? What brought this on?"  "I just miss Everly. She was so close"  I am pretty sure he didn't know what I was talking about, so I elaborated.  "A year ago today, she got moved to the third floor and out of the CICU. She was doing so good. She was so close."  Drew responded by reminding me of all the things we feel and believe to be true. Everly is free from

Hoping for the Best and Preparing for the Worst

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I thought it was time to finally update everyone on how baby Everly is doing and what we learned at the appointment with the specialist. Thank you for being patient with me. Although this blog is therapeutic, the topic is extremely heavy and I really think it took me a while to prepare (emotionally) to sit down and write this. Also, her defects are crazy! I don't understand the anatomy of a healthy heart, so to be thrown into this world and have to learn about all of her defects has been very confusing and overwhelming. Okay, so it was Friday, July 28th. Drew, Urban, Roger, and I had flown into Salt Lake THAT MORNING from Columbus, Ohio to get to our appointment up at the University of Utah. We had to leave for the airport around 4:30 AM, so we knew it was going to be an exhausting day. Want to hear something awesome? I literally didn't sleep the night before... I never closed my eyes. I just hung out and watched the time go by. Call it nerves, I guess. I was a complete zombi

It's Our Turn - Meet Everly Jo

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Hey guys! I have been getting a lot of questions from friends and family about whats going on with Everly. I have been thinking that in 20 years from now, when she is an Olympian she will appreciate reading words about this difficult time and what she had to overcome. I will first start off by briefly introducing myself and my little family. My name is Markie Ostler, I am married to the love of my life and best friend, Andrew Ostler. We met in May of 2013 and married April of 2014 in the Draper Utah LDS Temple. Exactly 2 years later we got a puppy, Roger, (he is a crazy little POS, but we love him). A little over a year later, we had our first baby, Urban Leroy, on June 4th 2016. Now we are pregnant with a baby girl, due November 12th. Up until giving birth to Urban, I was working for a software company called Solutionreach (shout out to them! It was a wonderful place to work,) and Drew does summer sales. If you aren't from Utah and you aren't familiar with "summer sal